To Abel Stearns
At age 14, in 1841, Arcadia Bandini married the 43-year-old Anglo-American Abel Stearns, who had moved west from his hometown in Lunenburg, Massachusetts. The marriage was arranged by Juan Bandini, Bandini's father, as Stearns and Juan Bandini were close political allies and friends. Bandini's younger sister, Ysidora, moved to Los Angeles with her to be her companion.
As Abel Stearns was not born a Mexican citizen, he had to petition the Los Angeles civil government to marry Bandini. He also had to petition the Catholic authorities, which was standard procedure for the time; the Church considered all prospective Catholic marriages to ensure that the parties' ages were appropriate, that they were not already married to others, whether their births were legitimate, and, chiefly, whether the union would be incestuous. While the gap in their ages was substantial, at 29 years (and Stearns himself claimed to authorities to be 40 rather than 43, perhaps to make the gap smaller), it was relatively common at this time for very young californias to marry significantly older Euro-American men. The Catholic Church had determined 11 to be the age below which a girl could not get married, so Bandini was above that standard.
Stearns, a former U.S. citizen, became a naturalized Mexican citizen and converted to Catholicism in order to do business and own property in Mexican California. He became one of the wealthiest men in Los Angeles, and his wealth was supplemented by Bandini's substantial dowry of land. They lived together in a home called El Palacio (The Palace; also known as the Don Abel Stearns House), built in 1859 in the Pueblo de Los Angeles. This large adobe home, which surrounded an extensive courtyard and patio, was a major site for Los Angeles high society. Here, the couple entertained and hosted influential guests like Commodore Jones and Captain Frémont. An 1860 census form recorded 19 people living in El Palacio, including "Refugio Bandini, Bandini's sisters, nieces, nephews, distinguished guests, secretaries, servants, painters, and laborers" in addition to Abel and Arcadia.
Arcadia Bandini de Stearns, along with her sisters, hosted many balls and other grand social functions for elite californios and naturalized Anglo-Americans like Stearns; de Stearns Baker, in particular, has been characterized by scholars as having "ruled Los Angeles society" in this period.
Abel Stearns, nicknamed "Cara de Caballo" (Horse Face) for his long face, was generally known and remembered as a good friend and husband, but was also known to have a bad temper. de Stearns Baker's grand-nephew Ricardo Bandini Johnson told a reporter from the Santa Monica Mirror that Abel was "often away" from home and thus "did not pay a lot of attention to Arcadia.” The couple did not have any children. Stearns died in 1871, at age 72, leaving all of his fortune (in land and money) to de Stearns Baker.
