The House of Bellacourt
Lillian Abigail Bellacourt, played by Natasha Leggero, is the second-eldest Bellacourt daughter, who is often seen wearing a tiara. After Charles Ponzi left her at the altar at age 11, "the height of a woman's sexual peak," she entered into a loveless marriage with Victor, with whom she has produced eight daughters, most of whom are named Susan. Lillian is smart and resourceful, but often falls victim to her own selfishness. Lillian consistently carries around her vicious chihuahua, Mayor Cutie, before killing the dog in a fit of rage. Following her deep depression when Laverne Fusselforth dies during their wedding ceremony and his grandson marries Hortense in the second-season finale, Lilian acquires a new chihuahua which she uses as a replacement Mayor Cutie.
Beatrice Bellacourt, played by Riki Lindhome, is the youngest daughter. She is twin to Frederick, with whom she is involved in an incestuous relationship. Beatrice serves as the "ideal woman" of the turn of the century. Tall, rich, and slender, she is a talented singer with no interest in politics and no opinions of her own. She exhibits exceptional selfishness and sociopathic tendencies, attempting to murder people without empathy. She is an idiot savant, with flashes of scientific genius, and helps guest Albert Einstein solve the theory of relativity. She has several children, including a son whom she calls The Little Asshole. Since being sent away to a nunnery in the second-season finale by Frederick, Beatrice has lost romantic interest in him.
Hortense Jefferson Library Bellacourt, played by Artemis Pebdani in the pilot episode, Lauren Ash in the remainder of the first season, Lauren Flans in the second season, and Donna Lynne Champlin in the third season, is the eldest Bellacourt child. Dodo and Commodore are both embarrassed by her unattractiveness, and "pray her life will be blessedly short." Hortense acts as a satire of the moderate bourgeoise feminist, calling for women's suffrage, and is a member of the Women's Temperance League as well as the Newport Association of Gal Spinsters (N.A.G.S.). Although Hortense is the most liberal character, she is as ruthless as any Bellacourt, exposing the family to ridicule when she sells their scandalous secrets to the press. In the second-season finale, Hortense married Bertram Harrison Fusselforth VII before their fiery automobile crash while on their honeymoon. Despite being reported dead, Hortense is revealed to have survived while ending up in a hospital as a Jane Doe, only to fully recover to confront Lillian and Beatrice upon learning they were going to give a speech before Congress in her stead.
Lord Frederick Bellacourt, played by Jason Ritter, is the youngest child and the heir to the Bellacourt family fortune. He is the illiterate twin brother of Beatrice, with whom he is involved in an incestuous relationship. He lacks any semblance of ambition, as he appears simple-minded and his life consists of leisure activities. After being set to marry Celery Savoy, Frederick is arranged by the Commodore to be a Senator and then future Vice President of the United States under Theodore Roosevelt.
Commodore Bellacourt (originally Harold Bellawitz, a fur trapper), played by David Koechner, is the family patriarch and "magnet magnate." Often away on business, he avoids his family when he is home. After disowning Lillian and Beatrice in the season one finale when their scandals are made public, the Commodore takes them back in order to have them annul their husbands and marry into rich families so that he can regain his fortune. He is left bankrupt when the marriages do not pan out, with Dodo buying the manor and banning him from the estate.
Dorothea "Dodo" Bellacourt, played by Paget Brewster, is the wife of the Commodore and the mother of his first four children. She begins to suspect her husband is having an affair, and delves deeper into her pre-existing morphine addiction to cope. Her condition worsens as the series progresses, and she attempts to quit cold turkey after she forces herself upon the butler Peepers after drinking too much absinthe. In the second season, Dodo flees the Bellacourt estate and joins a nunnery upon finding out that the Commodore plans to have her institutionalized for giving away most of his fortune to charity. Dodo returns after the Commodore sends her divorce papers, the charity organizations she donated to revealed as fronts as she transferred the Bellacourt fortune to the abbey in her name. In the third season, Dodo becomes the sole owner of the Bellacourt estate and bans the Commodore from the premises.
Victor Schmemmerhorn-Fish V, played by Brian Huskey, is a self-centered Bavarian married to Lillian who married into the Bellacourt family in order to "stack cash", but feels that he cannot live "on a husband's allowance." A closeted homosexual, he is in a secret relationship with Albert. In the second season, Victor agrees to have his marriage to Lillian annulled on the condition that he be allowed to continue living at the manor. In the third season, Victor is revealed to be the uncle of Adolf Hitler.
Albert Downsy, Jr., played by David Wain, is married to Beatrice. A closeted homosexual, he is in a secret relationship with Victor. In the second season, Albert agrees to have his marriage to Beatrice annulled on the condition that he be allowed to continue living at the manor.
Celery Savoy Bellacourt, played by Missi Pyle, is a socialite who becomes engaged to Frederick after his appointment to the United States Senate. But after her marriage to Frederick, Celery is disowned by the Savoy family following the Bellacourts' scandals being made public. She has since attempted to use Frederick as a means to regain her status.
